Penisology Reviews  (2010, January)
 

 Solving the World's Problems

Global Evidence for Penisology as the Unified Theory of Humanism and Physics

 

Chapter 1: Vladimir Putin (below, video) explains how to solve the problems in the Middle East.

It's not about phony Israeli Religious (because they're simply racists, like the NAZI Germans) or about Islamic Fundamentalism.  The problems in the Middle East are caused by both sides falsely claiming religion as the motivation behind their actions against each other.  Zionist Israelis want the land "from the Nile to the Tigris and Euphrates," and the "terrorists" are simply people who don't want the Israeli Fascists to be funded by the United States:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-S1ZfjZmjgA

So, Putin's answer was to dare any of them - Jew or Muslim - to truly put their religion on the line:  "If it's about religion, then, by all means, get back to your religion.  Focus on your penis-adoration and penis-obsession and get the hell out of the bombs and bullets business."

Therefore, we all need to focus more on penises.   We all know deep down in our groins that penises are the center of the universe.

 

Chapter 2:  Munchausen's, Psychosomatics, and the Paranormal - Is there a link?
 

Munchausen's By Proxy and Paranormal experiences (objects moving, apparitions, apporting) were  imperfected theories of Illness Manifestation that could be better explained when fully developed into the realm of penises. 

If it is true that collective, somatized illness complaints (statistically shown to be real via the percentages of persons showing the same physiological sign) in persons who claim to have chronic fatigue/Lyme are the likes of MMP-130, dysregulated cytokines, OspA- reactive T cells that simultaneously attacking myelin (Mark Klempner, 1998, Autoimmunity, Is it Thee or Me?)...etc, etc, are known to occur due to a lack of sexual gratification, while at the same time, physical phenomena without known physical cause (paranormal) manifesting on television, YouTube, devices, (etc, are caught on film and register with devices that detect changes in heat and energy), have been captured, and "scientifically proven," then it is true that the Paranormal is psychosomatized, or GENERATED, collectively or singly, and register as real phenomena on the equipment.

Now, what would these misguided "Chronic Fatigue" individuals be doing if they weren't imaginating real physical phenomena?

They would be happily masturbating or otherwise seeking and achieving sexual gratification.

 

Chapter 3:  CDC's Favorite Topic; Obesity Caused by Insufficient Penises

This is an obvious question of cart-horse or horse-cart

Which came first?  The Overeating or the Not-Enough-Sex, and is it curable?

Here is a difficult subject best treated by case study.  Let's use one of DCF's Chief Whores and Drunkards.  The Chief used the technique of drinking alcohol instead of eating to avoid weight-gain.  Then she went on to a multiple-sex-partner lifestyle.

She had the Order of Operations wrong and that was her mistake.  If she went straight to the Sex-o-holism, instead of taking the intermediary steps of overeating-followed-by-alcohol/food-compensation, she would not have run into any of her troubles.

Has a prospective study on the reversal by sex of obesity been performed?

We will be asking for funding for such an endeavor.  Then we'll mass-produce the films and put them on in XXX market.  Sex is always a win-win enterprise.

 

Chapter 4, Applications of the Science

Penis-Centric B Cells, Mycoplasma, B-Cell Immortalization, and Epstein-Barr Activation
 

What are the antigens we would otherwise think responsible?
http://www.jimmunol.org/cgi/content/full/173/4/2683
 

Pam3Cys- the HIV and LYMErix vaccines:
http://www.actionlyme.org/Pam3Cys_Version15.htm
 

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed?term=15331449[uid]&cmd=DetailsSearch&log$=details
Blood. 2004 Dec 15;104(13):4252-9. Epub 2004 Aug 26.

Mycoplasma fermentans infection promotes immortalization of human peripheral blood mononuclear cells in culture.

Zhang S, Tsai S, Wu TT, Li B, Shih JW, Lo SC.

Department of Infectious and Parasitic Diseases Pathology, American
Registry of Pathology, Washington DC, USA.
 

Chronic infection or colonization by mycoplasma(s) could gradually and significantly alter many biologic properties of mammalian host cells in culture, including induction of malignant transformation. We examined effects of Mycoplasma fermentans infection on the continuing survival and immortality of human peripheral blood mononuclear cells (PBMCs) from healthy blood donors. Without specific supplemental growth factors, human PBMCs normally die rapidly, with few cells other than macrophages/monocytes surviving after 2 weeks in cultures. Only occasional Epstein-Barr virus (EBV)-positive B lymphocytes would continue to proliferate and undergo spontaneous immortalization. Our present study revealed that infection of human PBMCs in culture with the incognitus and PG18 strains of M fermentans, but surprisingly not with some other strains tested in parallel, markedly enhanced the rate of EBV-positive B lymphocytes to undergo immortalization (74% vs 17%).   Compared with spontaneously immortalized PBMCs, the PBMCs immortalized in cultures infected with the mycoplasmas often had prominent karyotype changes with chromosomal loss, gain, or translocations.  Furthermore, many of these immortalized B lymphocytes were found to be monoclonal in nature. The in vitro findings would be of relevance to lymphoproliferative disorders that occurred in patients with immune suppression. ***The mycoplasma-mediated promotional effect in cell immortalization and its potential clinical implications warrant further study.***

PMID: 15331449 [PubMed - indexed for MEDLINE]
- - - -
 

So there ya have it:

Not-Enough-Penis causes the psychosomatization of Pam3Cys-induced immortalized B cells, activation of common viruses of all kinds and lymphoproliferative disorders.

 

Taking the Unified Theory of The Primacy of Penises in Medicine to the next logical step (the true test of the soundness of the theory, the predictability it lends),
http://rawstory.com/2009/12/scientists-discovery-antibody-kills-prost...
Scientists discover a way to fix penises - as the first application - through the immortalization and cultivation of penis-centric B cells.

 

Chapter 5, "Criminal Minds"

 
DCF's Penisbiter  found to be not "criminal" in Corrupticut.

Why?  What court in Connecticut could possibly say the DCF's penisbiter was doing something wrong? 

The legal premises are that children belong to the State (Kaplan), and that they should be indoctrinated with Penisology.  The known outcomes in the United States of DCF Penisology is that 1/2 of teenaged girls who exit DCF whore school become pregnant teenaged girls.

This could not be called anything other than success.

 

Chapter 6, The Fall of the American Empire

Why did the country collapse, and how was the last 10 years a witness to it?
 

Dionne: The last decade was simply a post-mortem (Cause of Death: Greed and Bullshit) 

Instead of remaining focused on penis-obsession, the Unites States' Society went retro and there was stuck in the Anal Retentive phase for the last 10 years, if not since the 1970s, with Henry Kissinger and Richard Nixon disconnecting the dollar from a precious-metal standard.  The people went Borneo on all the nearly-free goodies.  It rained funny US dollars from China to feed the gods of the Dot Guv Employee Unions and the Repugnicant God of Greed. 

It was all about STUFF and APPEARANCES, and not about penises, where had it remained, the United States would not be looking at its disgusting self, wondering what's the new magic formulary - what's the sorcery - to invent energy/power/wealth out of thin air?

Should we kill more Arabs for it?

What does the Unified Theory of Penisology and Physics tell us?

What is the cure for the National Pussification Ailment- the thing that causes people to hard-wish (psychogenerate) imaginary diseases?


Could we put this Not-Enough-Penis psychogenerating force to work for us?

We'd have to give up penises.

Oh.

Nevermind.